Life Commitment
What are you committed to in your life? Are you committed to following through with your word, giving your best to your work, meeting your families and friends needs, dedicating yourself to worthy causes? What about with yourself, do you have any commitments just for you? So often, many of us put everything and everyone else first and then have very little time or energy left over to give to ourselves. As we know, this leads to frustration, resentment and burnout. Our commitments are then born out of duty and obligation rather than stemming from our hearts and desires.
When we make a commitment to honor ourselves first or at least equally, we feel full and grateful and then have the energy to give to others freely out of choice. Honoring our values and needs supports us in setting healthy boundaries and making appropriate decisions. What would your life would be like if you made a commitment to fully honor yourself on a regular basis? Are you willing to find out?
Insights
What have you been committed to in the past year? What commitments take up the most time and energy? Are they mostly for others, or for you, or both?
What commitments have you made in the past year that are mainly for you or honour you as much as the other (i.e. a creative hobby, learning something your really interested, pampering yourself regularly, spending time with people you enjoy, doing work that ignites your passion etc.).
What motivates you to make commitments (i.e. passion, desire, obligation, duty, survival, pressure etc.)? How are you at fulfilling your commitments? Are there any patterns regarding commitments you break versus commitments you follow through on (for example, do you break commitments to yourself more often than to others or vice verse)?
Inspiration
Make a list of all the things you would like to commit to for this next year (not have to, but want to). Start with things that are mainly for you and then add on commitments regarding other people and situations. Set your intention to implement these throughout the year.
Make a list of all the commitments you would like to let go of this year and brainstorm ideas on how to do this (let yourself come up with zany and bizarre ideas to get your creativity and possibilities flowing) and then follow-through with these one at a time.
Spend 10 - 15 minutes every day imagining what your life will be like as you honor yourself by making commitments that nourish and support you while letting go of ones that don't. If any guilt or fearful feelings come up, release those as well and replace them with the feelings of enthusiasm and joy.
The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Monday, October 4, 2010
Courage
Courage is not something that comes from flying to your heart in moments of need or in emergencies. Courage is not something that can be handed over to you through lessons either.
Courage is a way of life. It is as much a habit as anything else. Like getting up and brushing your teeth in the morning, or drinking coffee.
It’s a matter of routine more than anything else. People tend to speak of courage only in terms of deeds. For instance, they might speak of courage in the battlefield. Soldiers and policemen are supposed to show courage. Or they might refer to courage in the face of devastation. Flood-affected people or earthquake victims must show courage.
However, courage is not merely the name you can give to your putting up with a bad situation. After all, in a bad situation, there is not much one can do expect cope with whatever strength and forbearance you can muster.
But though we don’t notice it, a lot of courage is part of our routines. The man who gets into a blocked sewer shows courage. The man who tills the land, not knowing whether he will have a good monsoon shows courage. The woman who resists the temptation to lavish goodies on her children shows courage. The child who breaks a leg on the football field but goes back to the game later shows courage. The student who is bent on following his dreams shows courage.
The real test of courage is in our daily lives. Or should be.
The courage to speak the truth. All the time. Because lies are the biggest and most obvious sort of cowardice that all of us hide behind.
The courage to speak our mind and not stay silent, simply because we are afraid that other people might not agree with us. Of course, there will be conflicting views. And of course, conflict is unpleasant. But not speaking your mind can lead to much worse unpleasantness.
The courage to stand up for what we believe in. The courage to follow public rules and laws and insist that other people follow them too. The courage to resist those who take easy ways out, which only leads to more corruption and red tape in our social systems.
Mark Twain has said, Courage is not the absence of fear. It is acting in spite of it.
The sign of a courageous person, then, is someone who is feels, fear, recognizes fear and still goes on to do what he or she believes is right.
Courage is a way of life. It is as much a habit as anything else. Like getting up and brushing your teeth in the morning, or drinking coffee.
It’s a matter of routine more than anything else. People tend to speak of courage only in terms of deeds. For instance, they might speak of courage in the battlefield. Soldiers and policemen are supposed to show courage. Or they might refer to courage in the face of devastation. Flood-affected people or earthquake victims must show courage.
However, courage is not merely the name you can give to your putting up with a bad situation. After all, in a bad situation, there is not much one can do expect cope with whatever strength and forbearance you can muster.
But though we don’t notice it, a lot of courage is part of our routines. The man who gets into a blocked sewer shows courage. The man who tills the land, not knowing whether he will have a good monsoon shows courage. The woman who resists the temptation to lavish goodies on her children shows courage. The child who breaks a leg on the football field but goes back to the game later shows courage. The student who is bent on following his dreams shows courage.
The real test of courage is in our daily lives. Or should be.
The courage to speak the truth. All the time. Because lies are the biggest and most obvious sort of cowardice that all of us hide behind.
The courage to speak our mind and not stay silent, simply because we are afraid that other people might not agree with us. Of course, there will be conflicting views. And of course, conflict is unpleasant. But not speaking your mind can lead to much worse unpleasantness.
The courage to stand up for what we believe in. The courage to follow public rules and laws and insist that other people follow them too. The courage to resist those who take easy ways out, which only leads to more corruption and red tape in our social systems.
Mark Twain has said, Courage is not the absence of fear. It is acting in spite of it.
The sign of a courageous person, then, is someone who is feels, fear, recognizes fear and still goes on to do what he or she believes is right.
LOVE
Love is Sharing
Believe me when I say that this is one of the most important ingredients of love. It is important to open ones heart and share – pain, joy, success and failure, it really does not matter, as long as the heart is clear. Love is being honest and knowing that the other person feels the same way too, it is sharing and losing ones inhibitions and knowing that the person on the other side will never be judgmental.
Love is Talking
Yes, love is talking. It is about speaking, telling and sharing. After some time people restrict their conversations to discussing bills, children and pets. This is a sure indicator of things going down hill. Bring the spark back by starting a conversation.
Love is Spending Time Together
A few minutes spent together everyday keeps the boredom away. I just made this up right now, but it is because I feel there is nothing like time invested in a relationship…believe me, it pays! Heavy work schedules take up much time and effort, so it is important to get things into perspective.
Love is Faithfulness
To love means to be true, to love unconditionally means to give with all your heart to one, and only one. Love is when you realize that he/she is the best thing that has happened to you and you want to cherish that person and the moments spent with him/her till death do you part.
Love is Being Friends
Love is being friends with each other. Enjoying simple pleasures in life like shopping, catching a movie or watching television at home, apart from a host of other things that "Friends" normally do!
Love is Looking Together in the Same Direction
This may sound clichéd, but it is true…love is having the same goals and taking steps in that direction to make them come true.
I would like to end with one of my favorite quotations…
"Love is the flower of life, and blossoms unexpectedly
and without law, and must be plucked where it is found,
and enjoyed for the brief hour of its duration.
Believe me when I say that this is one of the most important ingredients of love. It is important to open ones heart and share – pain, joy, success and failure, it really does not matter, as long as the heart is clear. Love is being honest and knowing that the other person feels the same way too, it is sharing and losing ones inhibitions and knowing that the person on the other side will never be judgmental.
Love is Talking
Yes, love is talking. It is about speaking, telling and sharing. After some time people restrict their conversations to discussing bills, children and pets. This is a sure indicator of things going down hill. Bring the spark back by starting a conversation.
A few minutes spent together everyday keeps the boredom away. I just made this up right now, but it is because I feel there is nothing like time invested in a relationship…believe me, it pays! Heavy work schedules take up much time and effort, so it is important to get things into perspective.
Love is Faithfulness
To love means to be true, to love unconditionally means to give with all your heart to one, and only one. Love is when you realize that he/she is the best thing that has happened to you and you want to cherish that person and the moments spent with him/her till death do you part.
Love is Being Friends
Love is being friends with each other. Enjoying simple pleasures in life like shopping, catching a movie or watching television at home, apart from a host of other things that "Friends" normally do!
Love is Looking Together in the Same Direction
This may sound clichéd, but it is true…love is having the same goals and taking steps in that direction to make them come true.
I would like to end with one of my favorite quotations…
"Love is the flower of life, and blossoms unexpectedly
and without law, and must be plucked where it is found,
and enjoyed for the brief hour of its duration.
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